22+ Savage Comebacks for Fights

Being in a fight is never any fun. But sometimes, no matter how hard you try to avoid it, conflict seems unavoidable.

Whether you’re dealing with a bully at school or a difficult situation at work, being prepared with a few good comebacks can help you diffuse the situation and come out on top.

So, here are the best comebacks to use in fights.

Good Comebacks for Fights

When it comes to comebacks, timing is everything. If you can deliver your retort in a quick and clever way, you’ll be more likely to diffuse the situation before it escalates.

And of course, it’s important to choose your words carefully. A comeback that is too graphic or offensive will only make the situation worse.

Here are a few classic comebacks for fights that are sure to diffuse any tense situation:

1. I’d insult you back, but I don’t want to stoop to your level.
2. I see you’ve learned nothing from all those times you’ve been punched in the face.
3. If I throw a stick, will you leave?
4. I was about to give you a nasty look, but I see you already have one.
5. I could say nice things about you, but I’d rather tell the truth.
6. I would hit you, but that would be animal abuse.
7. I know I’m talking like an idiot. I have to because you wouldn’t understand what I’m saying otherwise.
8. You must think I’m someone who cares.

Winning an argument doesn’t always mean being right. In fact, some of the best comebacks are ones that make your opponent look foolish without directly insulting them.

For example, if someone tries to start a fight by calling you a name, you can simply reply with, “I’m sorry, I didn’t realize you were still in elementary school.”

This not only shuts down the insult but also makes the other person look childish.

Ultimately, the best comebacks are the ones that diffuse the situation without escalating it. By using humor or restraint, you can put an end to an argument before it even begins.

Good Comebacks in a Fight

There are a few key things to keep in mind when coming up with comebacks for fights.

First, you want to make sure that your comeback is actually clever and not just rude or mean-spirited.

Second, you want to make sure that it’s something that you can say quickly and easily in the heat of the moment.

And finally, you want to make sure that your comeback will actually distract or disarm your opponent long enough for you to make your escape!

With that in mind, here are a few of our favorite comebacks in a fight:

• Oh, I’m sorry, I thought this was a debate, not an argument.
• I would engage in a battle of wits with you, but I would never attack an unarmed person.
• I’m busy right now; may I ignore you another time?
• You sound better with your mouth closed.
• Oh come on, how old are you?
• Wow, you’re even dumber than you look.
• I’d like to see things from your point of view, but I can’t get my head that far up my as*.
• Mirrors don’t lie, and lucky for you they don’t laugh either.

When you’re in a fight, the last thing you want to do is give your opponent the upper hand by saying something stupid.

But unfortunately, in the heat of the moment, it’s often hard to think of a witty comeback.

So that’s why I’ve compiled this list of some of the best comebacks for when you’re in a fight, to help you keep your cool and come out on top.

You might like: 23+ Witty Comebacks for Insults

Good Comebacks for “Fight Me”

The phrase “fight me” is often used as a provocative challenge, as an invitation to physical violence.

It’s the kind of thing that might be said in the heat of the moment, in a fit of anger or frustration. But it’s also the sort of thing that can quickly escalate a situation into something dangerous.

So what should you do if someone says “fight me” to you?

The next time someone tells you to fight them, don’t just take the bait. Instead, come back with a witty retort that will leave them speechless.

Here are a few possible comebacks for fight me:

• Sorry, I don’t have time for this.
• I’m not interested in fighting. But I am interested in talking things out calmly and peacefully.
• Why do you want to fight? What would that accomplish?
• I don’t want to fight you, but I will if I have to.
• I’d love to, but I don’t want to ruin your pretty face.
• Your mom wouldn’t want us to fight, now would she?

Of course, you could always just ignore the person and walk away.

But where’s the fun in that? With a clever comeback, you can not only diffuse a potentially dangerous situation, but you can also get the last word in.

So next time someone challenged you to a fight, be ready with one of these good comebacks.

Read next: What to Say When Someone Says “Or What?” (10 Things!)

Final Thoughts

Being in a fight is never fun. But sometimes, even if you don’t want to be, you can’t help but find yourself in one.

And when that happens, it’s important to be prepared with a sharp comeback. Otherwise, you’ll just be left looking like a fool.