27 Funny Comebacks for Friends!


We’ve all been there; the moment when someone says something so absurd, offensive, or just plain wrong that we’re left speechless.

In those moments, a clever comeback can seem like a lifesaver.

However, thinking of a witty retort on the spot can be difficult, which is why it’s always good to have a few comebacks up your sleeve.

Whether you’re dealing with a friend who just won’t drop a lame joke or an acquaintance who likes to make snarky comments, these funny comebacks for friends will help you shut them down.

So the next time you’re looking for a way to shut down a conversation or simply want to get a laugh, give one of these comebacks a try.

Funny Comebacks for Friends


If you’re the type of person who loves to come up with clever responses on the fly, then you’ll definitely appreciate this list of funny comebacks for friends.

Whether you’re trying to defuse a tense situation or just have a good laugh, these one-liners are sure to hit the mark.

Here are some of the best comebacks for friends:

  • That’s what she said.
  • It’s not that I don’t like you, it’s just that I don’t really like you.
  • You’re welcome.
  • Do you want me to talk slower so you can understand?
  • I’m not mad, I’m just disappointed.
  • Well, I would agree with you but then we’d both be wrong.
  • Oh yeah? Well, the Jerk Store called! They’re running out of you!
  • You know what blows my mind about you? 10,000 sperm and you’re the fastest!
  • I don’t know what your problem is, but I bet it’s hard to pronounce.
  • Everyone who loves you is wrong.
  • Can you repeat that, I want to remember the stupidest thing I have ever heard.
  • Ha-ha, f*ck you too.
  • I’m trying to see it from your point of view, but I just cant get my head that far up my own arse.
  • I’m sorry. I was trying to give a sh*t about you, but that was the best I could manage.
  • Your mom.
  • Did I ask?
  • No, you.
  • Who asked?
  • Why don’t you talk about something you know?
  • I know you are but what am I?
  • That’s a big word for a retard.
  • I’ll be happy to stop arguing with you the day you’ll stop being wrong.
  • I’m sorry, I must have forgotten that you’re an expert on everything.
  • That’s why no one likes you.
  • Remember when I asked for your opinion? Me neither.
  • That’s pretty funny! Did you just think of it or have you been saving it?
  • Unless your name is Google, don’t act like you know everything.

So next time your friend says something insensitive, be prepared with a witty comeback that will leave them feeling embarrassed and red-faced.

And if they still don’t get the hint, maybe it’s time to find some new friends!

Final Thoughts

Thanks for checking out our list of funny comebacks for friends!

We hope you found it helpful and that you’re now armed with some clever responses for the next time your friends try to take a shot at you.

Whether your friend is making a joke at your expense or you’re just in the mood for some good-natured banter, these comebacks will have you both laughing in no time.

And who knows, you might even come up with a new inside joke or two.

Remember, wit is always the best way to deal with someone who’s trying to bring you down.

So keep your head up and keep laughing – it’s the best way to show them that they can’t get to you.

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